AITA for wanting to split living costs with BF instead of paying market rent to him?

December 11, 2025

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AITA for only wanting to pay true half of living costs, without contributing to the equity/principal portion of his mortgage payment?

Me and my boyfriend are moving in together, but we can't agree on how to split the living costs. He wants me to pay more due to his low mortgage rate and my higher spending habits, but I feel it should be an equal split. AITA?

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I feel like we are moving in as a couple, and even though we are not married, as a couple we should more or less split things.

We both earn good salaries and are about to move in together. However, we can't agree on how to divide our living expenses, especially concerning the mortgage. He wants me to pay more due to his low interest rate, but I believe it should be more equitable.

"His mortgage has a low interest rate, so he says I should pay more."

I don't feel right about paying more than him and not benefiting from equity in his home. He thinks I should contribute based on market rent rates to offset his low interest mortgage, but I disagree. Am I in the wrong here?

🏠 The Aftermath

We're at a standstill over our financial split, especially regarding his low-interest mortgage. It's causing tension as we prepare to move in together.

I believe in an equal division of expenses, but he wants me to contribute more due to his lower interest rate. This disagreement is straining our relationship as we blend our lives.

The outcome remains uncertain, but the disagreement highlights differing perspectives on financial fairness and couplehood without marriage.

"Financial splits can reveal underlying values about equity, sharing, and expectations within a relationship."

It's a challenging situation, where financial values and perceptions of fairness clash, complicating an otherwise harmonious plan to live together.

💭 Emotional Reflection

Financial discussions when moving in together can reveal underlying expectations and values, impacting the harmony of a relationship. The disagreement on splitting living costs is a reflection of our differing views on fairness and partnership.

The challenge lies in finding a compromise that is equitable and aligns with our beliefs about financial responsibility within a relationship.

Sometimes, what seems like a simple cost-sharing decision can expose deeper sentiments about equity and shared financial burdens in a relationship dynamic.